Newsletter: Friday, April 24, 2026

In the Crystal palace gardens

Trusting the Path I Can’t See

I’m looking out at the Douro River in Porto. I have been here for a week now, and I know the city well enough that I no longer need a map or to open my cellphone; I just walk. Imagine if your life was just walking—not really knowing where you are going or what your relationships are going to look like in the future—where all you have is the present moment. I am here to learn this much-needed skill: to just live right now.

It is tough at times, especially because I am writing my memoir. Why, you may be asking yourself? Well, it has been on my bucket list for a long time, and it is something that I felt in my heart I had to do. So, here in room 319 of the Altis Porto Hotel, I have sat for hours in the morning writing and recalling my past. I must tell you, at times it was painful to look back, but more importantly, it has been inspiring. I have done a lot! I have managed through many major decisions, and looking back, I know deep in my soul that at the time of those choices, I made the best decisions for me.

After raising a family, dealing with others' choices in how they want to proceed with relationships—on their terms, with their boundaries—has been a tough thing to swallow. Hindsight being 20/20, I realize now that I had a vision and a determination for how I wanted things to look in the future. When those dreams don’t come to fruition, it is painful. But it does not warrant a pity party; it warrants a pivot.

Life gets "lifey" at times, and I have to pivot. I have no choice. So here I sit, in a country that is absolutely beautiful with people who are so kind and welcoming, knowing that inside I am battling these thoughts of what life will be in the future. Thanksgiving, Christmas, birthdays, and the dreaded Mother’s Day, which is right around the corner. How is it going to feel to not have the phone calls or the flowers arriving? It is going to be lonely, but I am not there yet. I must live in the "now."

Sitting in the hotel restaurant this morning, to my left was a family: a young father and mother, a two-year-old daughter, and the mother’s mother, whom they brought along so she could have a holiday. It was beautiful to witness the dynamics. Even though they were speaking German and I couldn’t understand what they were saying, the joy and the promise were in their eyes. The husband and wife are expecting their second child in July, and I was elated for them, but at the same time, I had pangs for what my life used to be. I had a child born in July, and now I never speak to that child. He will be thirty this year and, honestly, I know nothing about him anymore. It made me sad, angry, and envious.

I cannot go on feeling these low-frequency feelings. I acknowledge how I feel, and I must move forward. What other choice do I have?

My story is changing, I am changing, and I am accepting life as it is—not how I wished or wanted it to be. God has a plan, and I have no idea what that plan is. So, just like the map on my phone, I have to walk blindly and not know what is right around the corner. It is what it is, and my only choice is to trust and keep walking.

On a very bright note, I am going to Fatima tomorrow—the place where the Blessed Mother appeared to three children in 1917! I have been to Medjugorje, and now I will go to Fatima to pray that the Blessed Mother gives me the strength to carry on and the knowledge in my heart that everything happens for a reason. We all can trust, and even if the picture doesn’t look how you want it to look today, have hope for tomorrow.

Trust.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend! Next Friday, I will be back home in my own bed with my pups and my hubby, and for that, I have a lot of hope!

Enjoy, and sending love and hugs from Porto.

XO,

Elizabeth “Bizzy” Chance

#ItsBizzy